And the world pulls back...

Is it my imagination or are we a part of this world or is the world a part of us? The reason I ask this is purely because Love lost carries a lot more meaning and implications than one would normally consider. To list a few examples, there is emotional denial, self confidance failure, self image doubt. To be included would be personal inspection with respect to how we approached a subject or in this case a relationship. Where could we have gone wrong? especially if we are told it is not us. Surely if it is not us ie: me the individual then why did it go wrong?

My life two weeks ago was full, the sun shone brighter, the soft was softer, the days shorter and everyone had a smile on their face, or so it seemed. Now after my love has been lost, people seem to be grumpy and everyone wants a fight. Strangers push you from side to side and no one will give you the gap to relax and enjoy what you can out of a day. Business has taken a dive and the oddest things have gone wrong or just not materialised at all. I have gotten sick for the first time in years and what has always been a two or three hour sickness has lasted four days now with no let up.

That leads to my question; are we of this world or is the world a part of us. If my attitude whilst in love could make everything so right and the unexpected change in my love life could bring about all this negativity, then surely it is of my own doing? What I mean by this is or would it not be true to say that your 'happiness' is then a state of mind. If we are a part of this world ie; the world controls us, then we would have no effect on the outcome whatsoever. But on the other hand if the world was a part of us ie; under our control then surely my recent experiences show that when I am positive the world is positive and when I am down and emotionally strained or depressed then everything appears to be going wrong, as it has over the last week.

So it would then be fair to say, If my emotional state determines my success or failure at work, or success or failure of a meal (as I have lost my appetite completely) or for that matter having three friends turn their back on you simultaniously, then surely it should all go right if I change my attitude towards failure.

It is definately a question worth exploring and we will see where I lost my positivity and 'lust' for life. But first thing is first, I have a "flu" bugs ass I need to kick....